"Sex And The City: The Original XXX Parody": This Time, The Sex Is Real!

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The notion of a porn based on "Sex and the City" raises a lot of questions. Can the female-oriented SATC really translate to a (presumably) male-oriented porn? Can a group of Angelenos do justice to such a New York tale?

And will Carrie actually take her bra off?

I must admit that, going in, I had my doubts about the project. But Lee Roy Myers and New Sensations left me pleasantly surprised (and more than a bit turned on). Between the quality cast and great directing, they've created a product that—if not a dead ringer for an episode of "Sex and the City"—is a fun, sexy romp through a few New York City bedrooms. Though it may seem counterintuitive, "Sex and the City" ultimately provides the framework for a press-ready porno that's incredibly hot and female-friendly—well, as long as the females in question enjoy watching couples lovingly engage in anal sex, threesomes, and a whole host of other filthy acts (all conducted in a sweet, loving manner!).

"Sex and the City: The Original XXX Parody" (not to be confused with the competing ) is set somewhere in between the end of the series and the beginning of the first movie: Carrie and Big are together (though not married), Miranda and Steve are in Brooklyn, Charlotte and Harry have tied the knot, and Samantha's still in New York (and still with Smith). True to the series, each character has her own loosely connected plot line: while Carrie debates whether or not to move to LA with Big, Miranda and Steve try to spice up their sex life, and Samantha deals with the discovery that Smith's been cheating. (Charlotte's "plot" is mostly just worrying about her friends and then having sex with Harry—but then, Charlotte always was the boring one.)

What really makes "Sex and the City XXX" is that—rather than hew to traditional porn tropes and expectations—it allows its performers to really engage in the age old fantasy of being, ahem, a Carrie, Miranda, Samantha, or Charlotte. Dirty girl Bobbi Starr may seem like a strange choice for the reserved Charlotte York-Goldenblatt, but she plays the good girl to a T. And when, after some sweet, passionate sex, she finally decides to become the up-the-butt girl (and the ATM girl, and the ATV girl), well, it's just the way we always imagined Charlotte's anal deflowering would go: sweet, loving, and very, very dirty.

And Bobbi's hardly the only shining star in the feature. Kayla Paige and Evan Stone start things off as Carrie and Big, getting things off to a riproaring start. A particularly nice touch? The scene does not end with the standard facial or other hand produced cum shot: no, Carrie actually sucks Big off to orgasm...you know, the way that real people do!

Then, of course, there's Miranda and Steve, who respond to the boredom of married Brooklyn by adding a little Staten Island spice (in the form of Coco Velvett) into their bedroom. It's hard to overstate just how much I've missed watching Tommy Pistol perform during his lengthy hiatus; it was an incredible thrill to see him as Steve. And though I haven't known Zoe Voss quite as long, her eager performance turned me into a fan (and I'd love to see her reprise any and all Alyson Hannigan roles—"Buffy XXX," anyone?). And with Coco Velvett added to the mix...well, it was a rather inspiring scene.

And we can't forget Brittany Andrews as Samantha. I was surprised to see that her scene—gasp!—actually involved the use of a condom (pretty much unheard of at New Sensations, or in most of the straight porn industry). I asked Lee Roy Myers about the choice, and was told that Brittany Andrews won't perform without a condom—and that he wanted her enough to agree to her terms. He made the right choice.

Brittany is a thrill to watch. In true Samantha fashion, she's up for anything (including some lovely anal and asslicking), and—again, just like Samantha—she really, really enjoys it. Brittany has this wonderful habit of trilling while she's getting pleasured: just thinking about it now gives me the chills (and its guaranteed to haunt my dreams for at least another week).

In a nod to the feature's presumed male audience, the film does, in fact, end with a four girl orgy. While the "Sex and the City" purist in me chafed at the non-canon scene, the porn fan in me loved seeing Brittany, Kayla, Bobbi, and Zoe all go at it together—and luckily, the script includes a twist that was allowed the competing halves of my brain to reconcile.

"Sex and the City: The Official XXX Parody" has the capability to be many things to many people. I hope, in my heart of hearts, that it'll find its fair share of female fans—and that, better yet, it'll help prove to the world (and future porn makers), that you can have really dirty, really loving sex...at the same time.

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Zoe Voss, Kayla Paige, Brittany Andrews, and Bobbi Starr
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Zoe Voss, Kayla Paige, Brittany Andrews, and Bobbi Starr
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Zoe Voss, Kayla Paige, Brittany Andrews, and Bobbi Starr
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Brittany Andrews and Danny Mountain
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Brittany Andrews and Danny Mountain
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Zoe Voss and Tommy Pistol
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Zoe Voss, Tommy Pistol, and Coco Velvett
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Kayla Paige and Evan Stone
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Kayla Paige and Evan Stone
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Tagged in: parody, dvd, gallery, brittany andrews, zoe voss, kayla paige, ralph long, sex and the city, avy scott, bobbi starr, evan stone, new sensations, tommy pistol, danny mountain, anthony rosano, coco velvett, lee roy myers, photo, straight, pornstars

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